Marvel’s ETERNALS was a stunningly mixed bag of a movie. Not terrible, just overlong and a bit dull in places, but balanced by some occasionally striking visuals and a better-than-average score by GOT composer Ramin Djawadi.
It’s not their first stumble as they transition to Phase 4 of the MCU but it’s probably their most talked-about, of the films they’ve released this year. I thought Black Widow was worse, but then again – that was supposed to be released at the start of 2020, but really should have been made after CIVIL WAR – it was doomed to irrelevence after the events of ENDGAME.
Anyway, ETERNALS is a (wannabe) epic tale of god-like entities called Celestials and the “eternals” they send to protect and guide the young worlds they’ve created. It opens with a 2001-ish opening scene of a monolith-style spaceship landing on Earth and meeting early humans, thousands of years ago. The Eternals themselves are an ethnically-diverse bunch of middling mostly-TV actors. And there’s a deaf one, for some unknown reason. Um… representation I guess. And they fight some evil monsters called “Deviants” that keep trying to eat people or something. Superhero movies are only as good as their villains, and this film really doesn’t deliver on this front. The villains are BORING and lacking in personality and interesting motivations.
In terms of pacing, it has issues. It almost feels like they made it as a TV series, then decided at the 11th hour to try and rework it into a movie. There’s so much redundant exposition in this movie – I swear I kept hearing the same dialogues again and again. Yeah, I know it’s not easy – as this an origin story with a large ensemble team of characters. But seriously, you could trim or merge whole scenes from this film and make it a fun 100 minute movie. Instead it’s over 2 and a half hours. And the ending is pretty damn unmoving – it all feels oddly impersonal and vague.
Chloe Zhao is an indie director who won an Oscar for Nomadland – a low-budget film about poor Americans who live in their vans. While her visual sensibilities are apparent in some of the visuals and cinematography (it does certainly have quite a different look from most Marvel movies) I’m not sure she was the right person to make a blockbuster superhero movie. There’s some epic ideas at play here, but they feel a bit generic and done to death by now. And though the cast isn’t top-drawer (apart from Angelina Jolie) they’re mostly likeable – but It all never really gels onscreen into a great movie.
I wish they’d done it as a Disney+ TV show instead. It might have worked better in that format. It’s not actually BAD as such, but it’s a pretty equal mix of OK and no-so-good. A bang-average 5/10 for me.
Still, we’ve still got Spiderman: No Way Home to look forward to, right? Let’s hope 2021 is not an annus horribilis for Marvel at the cinemas. At least the Disney+ TV shows have been great – and I’m looking forward to Hawkeye!
